"It’s true I crave you"

My letter to you

I hope that one day you’ll be able to forgive me if you haven’t already. I hope that one day you’ll truly understand why I did what I did. Not saying it was, in any way, a good thing to do but the motives and emotions behind what I did are so much stronger than you think and know. I feel myself get sad sometimes then I think “wait he never liked me as much as I liked him so why should I get upset over him?!” and eventually, I’ll turn my mood around. Except, I never knew how you felt. What if you never liked me at all, then I’ll feel like an idiot. But again, you weren’t the best communicator so I guess that will be left unanswered as well. I hope that one day I’ll understand why you did the things you did. I hope that one day I’ll be able to forgive you for the things you have also done to me. I hope that one day I’ll know how you really felt about me. I hope that some day in the future we’ll be able to talk again and be civil human beings. I hope that one day I’ll look back on our friendship and say only good things about it. I just want the best for you. There’s so many questions I have that are unanswered, thoughts that have not been said or clarified, feelings that were not confirmed. Things have definitely gotten better, and I think I’ve moved on for the most part. However, there are still those moments where I just flat out miss the hell out of you.